Sunday, September 4, 2011

Dear Deployment: Today you win

Dear Deployment:

Today you win and I am exhausted.

My house is a mess of boxes and suitcases that need to be unpacked. I have only been home a few days and I am already sick of eating processed crappy freezer foods, but I just don't have the desire to cook when it is only myself that I am feeding since the baby still mostly nurses. I can't get to the stove or sink anyway thanks to the mess...

I am thankful that I got to see my husband again via Skype and hear his voice, but I am so tired of having this be our only means of communication. Today it just isn't enough and I want him here instead. I attempted to do things I would normally have delegated to my husband and it turned into a huge disaster that still needs to be resolved. Unfortunately, I can't put it off until my husband gets home because it involves the safety of our young child. However, I will save the holes that now need to be patched for him to fix when he gets home because that's purely cosmetic and I don't care enough to bother.

Tonight, I'll wipe the tears from my eyes and go to bed snuggling my sweet girl. I may or may not gather the energy and drive to fix the mess tomorrow but I will rally again soon. You may have won today but I've learned that just like marriage, deployment comes with its ups and downs and neither the ups or the downs lasts forever.

Better days are coming...  Deployment, you may be ahead right now, but you're certainly not going to win!!


Webcam snapshot from our dating days in early 2008